moms, babies & robert

i spent some quality time on friday night with these three beautiful kids, darryl, keara & nate. they are my friend, maribeth's grandkids. the evening was spent with them, their mom, shelly and christine. lots of wine was imbibed (mostly by maribeth and i), some amazing food was consumed (thanks shelly) and laughter was abundant. i always know that when i spend time with maribeth that i will be laughing uncontrollably at some point throughout the evening. her laugh is her signature and one day i will get it on video. the kids were incredible. i'm sure that you can tell by this photo that they were pretty fun. so i spent that evening with three moms and three kids...and almost three bottles of wine. good good times.

the next morning, i spent the morning with my mom shopping. i got to spend more time with her this trip than i normally do on these quick trips down. i love my mom. she has the perfect way to ask a question that can burn and sting at the same time. now, it just makes me laugh. she really is amazing. and i'm glad that i've grown up enough to enjoy every single minute that i spend with her.

the reason i came down was to surprise my friend, joy at her baby shower. she and cain are having their first child and this seriously was the biggest baby shower that i've been to. they shut a filipino restaurant down and it was a pretty huge event.
i am not surprised by this at all. joy is by far one of the coolest people on earth. she is capable of amassing a bazillion friends, but making them all feel like they are completely special to her. she actually sent me a photo text of a building shaped like batman one day. she does stuff like that for everyone. i miss her a lot, but i love that i can just call her at any given time (like when i'm shopping in a store i think she'll love) and she'll talk to me like i saw her five minutes ago. and i'm not writing this just because she told me she started reading this blog. :) i think she knows how i feel. i am so excited that she's becoming a mom. she is going to be amazing....the coolest mom in school. cain is super cool as well...i could just tell by how he looked at joy and how happy they looked together.


i left the baby shower and spent the remainder of the evening with my friend, robert. not a mom, but he does love kids. he's planning to become an elementary school teacher. robert has known me over ten years now. i was accused of having "favorites" at work the other day. he would have classified in that category. and actually, he revealed to me that i upset him once because i called him out on something he did at work. so, even then, even though we may be friends, i will still call you out if you are not doing work...if not more so. i'm sure all of my friends reading this will laugh about their particular "ann yelled at me" stories. i love robert. i needed to see him this trip. he always has been there for me when i need him. beam and coke in hand.

he falls into the second group the type of friends i have...the ones who are very similar to me. people that can talk to anyone and that look for the good in everyone that they meet. this whole weekend i was surrounded by friends who fall into that category. it felt really good and i needed that tremendously. i was with three of the people i feel the most free to be completely myself with at all times. i am very lucky. not many people have those people in their lives. they do not judge what i say or do, no matter how what i say or do. it's freeing. i hope i provide them with that as well. all of my friends i hope.

i ended the weekend at church with my mom, church was amazing. i was able to pray the stations of the cross with my mom. i don't think we've done that before together. it was very powerful. after church, i had brunch with mary and maj, sara's mom and sister. i could have sat with them in the restaurant forever. i miss seeing them everyday. they just make feel good when i'm around them. guess that's what family means.

i started the weekend spending time with maribeth's family, saw the beginning of joy's new family, and ended my weekend with my family.

i am so blessed. sorry the blog is so long. i had so much to say. good times.

love or hate me

part one:

sara told me that i needed to post something new because she was sick of opening my blog and seeing her face pop up. :) instead, she gets to see the flowers that she received for valentine's day, which was awesome by the way. i took the day off and we went out to breakfast, to see a movie "No Country for Old Men," and had a nice quiet evening at home. it's pretty rare for us to have a day alone together, but even rarer is TWO in a row.

the second day, we actually had company. her friend molly joined us for dinner and to exchange christmas gifts. (yeah, it's been that long.) molly gave me one of the best magnets that i've ever gotten. and everyone is just going have to come over to see it...it's that cool. :)

this is her rabbit, Bunny Foo-Foo. she was being very friendly, thus a photo had to be taken and shared. a good time was had by all and luckily, we get to see molly again really soon. her birthday is on February 29th and this is the first time that we get to go out and celebrate it together...gotta love leap year. i thought my birthday was interesting.

part two:

the reason for the headline was something that came up in discussion with a friend last night. while asking the question, "how do you decide on who you are friends with?" i pointed out that i attract a certain kind of person. i also seem to hire people with very distinct personalities. the people in my life to whom i am closest are very straightforward, chock full of opinions (on everything), and have a "love me or hate me" personality. i have a lot of different types of friends, but this seems to a recurring theme. everyone knows i love quiet people as well, but these folks tend not to be quiet. as a result, i think i've become more direct and have developed opinions that i am actually willing to share. and i am way more comfortable in my skin than i have been in a really long time. i don't think i would ever fully become a "love me or hate me" person, but i do think that i have that within me and i LOVE that about other people.

besides, i'm so indirect with my feelings about things... i need people willing to put a mirror to my face to keep me honest. so, hate on haters.

two words: she passed

sara found out that she passed her second comprehensive exam today. thus, a second blog for today was necessary. i am so proud of her for so many things...this is just one of them. the wait is over, now she gets to write a dissertation. i sent out a text and i think my favorite response was, "holy shit congrats to her. soon you'll be a doctors wife." thanks for everyone's support and prayers. they were much appreciated.

"wheel in the sky keeps on turning..."

last night was nathan (far right) and andrew's (in the hat) final night at Borders. they were two of my all-time favorite employees. they were incredible independently, but they were a lot more fun together. they both served as stability to me in their roles.

andrew was always someone i could rely on in the cafe. he is completely brilliant and had a hand in training all of the staff that he's leaving behind. nathan has kept me sane since i got there. i remember him on the day of my interview. he came in early, as he did every day, looked at the daily schedule and chatted with india. he did that everyday. he chatted with everyone. and he always made me laugh. it won't be the same without them. who else is going to play journey on the overhead speaker while the store is open just to make me smile?

there were three people in the break room the day of my interview... two of them are gone. retail can be heartbreaking that way. people come and go really quickly. three people this week alone. i know more are on the way. i am glad that i am friends with so many of the people that i've met at work....past and present. for that, i am truly grateful.

happy birthday, elizabeth!

i'm a day late, but that shouldn't come as a surprise to many. i'm known elizabeth for over ten years now. we worked together at two different companies...my best retail and worst retail experience. i miss working with elizabeth a lot, but thankfully, she has escaped the world of retail.

i've learned many important lessons from elizabeth.

1. do not judge a book by it's cover. beauty is truly something that comes from within. her outer beauty is only enhanced by her amazingly huge heart. and don't assume that because someone is beautiful they are not intelligent as well.

2. drop everything to be there for a friend. she can't do it so much now that we live four hours apart. but when we lived fifteen minutes apart, she was always there when i needed someone to talk to. and i know that she does that for everyone she loves.

3. don't stop pursuing your goals. if there is something that elizabeth wants to achieve, she will not give up.

4. drive fast sometimes. listen to dave matthews. listen to metallica. laugh out loud.

5. try not to attract stalkers. :) change phone number often.

whether we are close or not, our friendship will be something that i will hold close to my heart. the thought of her will always make me smile. i have so many good memories of her and our times together that there is nothing but an amazing feeling in my heart when it comes to her. she is getting married this month and i am so happy that she has found someone to join her in her path of life. she deserves every moment of happiness. elizabeth has truly helped shape who i am and i love her very much. happy birthday!

"that's so gay"

(photo by Galen Rowell from savetibet.org)

i'm constantly amazed how easily people use this phrase around me. it's a common phrase. i use it as a joke sometimes if people know about me. usually, it is used more when a person doesn't know i'm a big ol' lesbian. this phrase doesn't really bother me as much as it used to, but people say deeply insulting things quite often without thinking about it.

there are so many things that one doesn't know about a person by just looking at them. you don't know their ethnic background, their sexuality, if they suffer from chronic or mental illness or their history of abuse. it's one thing if someone has the guts enough to ask me, "are you filipino, mexican, or hawaiian?" or "are you gay, straight, or bisexual?" no one is going to ask you "do you suffer from depression, borderline personality, or are you bi-polar?" no one is going to ask if you suffered from mental, physical, or sexual abuse in your past. no one assumes that someone in your family or a close personal friend may be affected by any of these issues.

i actually had to speak to an employee about using the word "spic" while speaking to another employee. i haven't heard that word since the eighties.

just yesterday, a friend said her husband accused her of being "bipolar" during an argument. i'm assuming that he meant to call her "crazy" or "strange," definitely meant as an insult.

when i start somewhere new, i always expect to be confronted with anti-gay sentiment, whether it is intentional or not. "fag." "that's so gay." i can usually tell who will be open and who will not. i'm still amazed how willingly people throw around insults despite who may be listening. no one pays attention to the look on people's faces when they touch a nerve.

i am guilty of making assumptions. we all are guilty of it time to time. i even let people make assumptions about me when it is easier. but i know i do not assume that i know everything about a person after a short amount of time. there are things that people who have known me forever don't know....

i'm a straight, mexican woman with borderline personality.

just ask my girlfriend.

parking wars

after a weird/bad/stupid day at work, i came home to one of my newest favorite television shows, parking wars on A&E. i love how the meter readers react to their "customers." my favorite part of the show is when cars get "booted." just watch one show and you will be hooked. it definitely takes a special breed to work for the parking authority. this show actually makes it look fun. dangerous, but fun.