Just Five Minutes

a new life. a new blog.

2009-12-22T09:24:00.000-08:00

my next phase
come visit me sometimes.

a REAL update

2009-09-04T06:01:00.000-07:00

just some of the moments...and some of the friends... great summer

an article a friend of mine wrote...

10 Reasons to Savor Being Single by Barry Davidson

ingenious or freaky?

2009-09-04T05:51:00.000-07:00

the medley is pretty ingenious, but the multiple images of the same guy is weird. he's a good singer.

my so-called life

2009-08-15T06:19:00.000-07:00

i haven't blogged (really) for awhile. i am currently obsessed with watching this show online. for me, it still translates. this particular episode is about how jordan catalano cannot read.

i've been housesitting for friends since the beginning of august in virginia. as a result, i've gotten to spend quite a bit of time with folks on this side of the bridge. i also took a trip to virginia beach with my friend, savannah. a festive night was spent at the rainbow cactus with my straight (but not narrow) friends from home. too much to drink. a little bit of dancing. and a early morning trip to ihop. good times.

i think i'm taking a break from drinking. not entirely. let's be realistic.

i am definitely going to slow down for the month of september...or so i think.

paper heart

2009-07-30T05:32:00.000-07:00

i love michael cera. i want to see this.

had a great vacation. made a video of the trip, but it includes tons of pics of the kids...a little too much exposure on the net. so i will edit together another video & post that soon. it was amazing. seriously.

words are not enough

2009-06-29T21:57:00.000-07:00

thank [thangk]
–verb (used with object)
1. to express gratitude, appreciation, or acknowledgment to: She thanked them for their hospitality.
2. thank God, (used interjectionally to express relief, thankfulness, etc.) Also, thank goodness, thank heaven.
definition from dictionary.com

i am very, very lucky. i am extremely, extremely blessed. i have some incredible friends who day after day without knowing it, save my life. in times like these when my tendency is to isolate, i have been dragged out, checked in on, invited to stay and even given a key for shelter. i have even been buckled into a car seat and driven home without remembering how i got there. i have ridden the roller coaster of emotions within the past few months, but feel like i have had people keeping me grounded. i try to always say thank you. it never seems enough. phone calls. text messages. emails. and one amazing letter. all appreciated and much needed.

i'm not going to use names. you will know who you are...i know i will forget people. i'm old. these are just a few examples.

each of my friends at my job have been incredible in their own way. i truly don't know how they put up with me on a day to day basis. they've gotten drunken text messages, weird phone calls and they even hang out with me outside of work. what are they thinking? i love them all, as a group and as individuals.

i have a friend who i have only seen three times within the course of our friendship the past two years. she has listened to all of my anger and my mistakes since this all started. she has always had my back from minute one and she always manages to make me laugh. she is amazing and i am grateful.

i just reconnected with a college friend who though only having seen her three times has helped me discover something about myself. and she doesn't even know it yet. i just feel peaceful when i'm around her. she just listens. smiles. hugs.

i have a friend that just texts me every so often to tell me that she misses me.

i have a friend who i trust so much that i can lose absolutely all of my control with him and i trust he will take care of me. and he always has and he always does. we say more to each other by actually not talking.

i have a friend that i've known so long that at times we have our own language. we can be completely evil with each other and know that underneath it all we are good. we haven't been close in awhile, but i am thankful that he didn't give up on our friendship.

i have friends that in the midst of all that they was going through in their own personal lives, invited me over for dinner and just listened. they call. they text. they pray.

i have been blessed with three families in my life. my biological one. and two families that have adopted me. i have spent a lot of time with one of those families lately. all i can say is they love each other so much that you can feel it immediately when you are in their presence. you instantly feel welcome and safe. "come as you are and be as real as you can." seems to be their motto. and sarcasm is not only welcome, it is required. they have literally kept me afloat and putting one foot in front of the other. they will never know how much their presence in my life means to me. words fail. i hope they can feel it when i hug them.

and car whisperer, you know who you are, i don't know what i would do without you. truly. words can't describe our friendship or even come close. the word "friendship" doesn't even cut it. seriously.

"From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked." Luke 12:48 (NIV)

every gesture, thought, and prayer has meant a lot. believe me. and i hope everyone that i call a friend knows that i will be there for them in return. i love all of my friends with all of my being. i know i am not always the greatest at keeping in touch, but you are all in my thoughts. i just had to say, "thank you."

and don't even get me started on the new friends i've made lately....

Rest in Peace, Michael Jackson

2009-06-29T21:53:00.000-07:00

i cannot image my life without his music. i just went to visit one of my friends a couple of weeks ago and his songs kept popping up on my itouch. so often that one morning she told me that she was singing "Beat It" when she woke up. he was as troubled as he was talented. but in reality, who isn't?

a father's day message

2009-06-23T07:22:00.000-07:00

my friend, elizabeth and her baby girl, emma sending out wishes to her husband, james. any and all prayers are welcome for a safe return.

the story of us

2009-06-09T09:05:00.000-07:00

we had a good run at it. ten years is more than some people can ask of most relationships. the photos above are the simplest explanation of what happened. in the end, does the "why" matter to anyone other than to the people involved? it is what it is. a new chapter in my life has begun. this is my theme song for what is to come when the roller coaster ride of emotion comes to a halt.

if you are finding out this way, then i apologize. it was not meant to hurt anyone's feelings. i promise. i have been thoroughly been amazed by my friends and family. i could ask for nothing more from the people who have been around me lately. i am extremely blessed by incredibly awesome people. i just can't tell the story any other way.

movie i most want to see this summer...

2009-06-01T13:56:00.000-07:00

are you serious?

2009-06-01T03:28:00.000-07:00

like i wasn't excited before? yeah i'm a geek fan. i accept that.

UP UP UP

2009-05-30T12:35:00.000-07:00

this is my friend, jen, from college. i thought this was awesome. i haven't watched the movie yet. i will. very very soon.

twilight revisited

2009-05-11T22:03:00.000-07:00

i have watched this movie multiple times since it's release on DVD. upon the second viewing, i fell in love with this movie. it has joined the list of several guilty pleasure movies that i now own. i am greatly looking forward to the second movie, "new moon." i even have a favorite line now, "let a playa play." said by eric after the famous, "how you likin' the rain?" line. you have to really listen to hear it, but it makes me laugh every time. below is a link to the 30 second bunny version of twilight.

i have a tiny circle of friends who enjoy this movie like i do, so i am not alone.... i relate to it and it fascinates me. and i have to let go of the book to enjoy the movie. and i will always hate the "sparkling" no matter how many times i watch it.

twilight bunnies video

dark knight 60s style

2009-05-11T08:31:00.000-07:00

i am meredith

2009-04-24T05:36:00.000-07:00

i love ross matthews. not just because he is one of the gayest men ever...watch the video and tell me that it is not true.

i am meredith

sunshine cleaning

2009-04-23T20:15:00.001-07:00

this is one of the best movies that i've seen in awhile...at least since oscar season. i got a chance to see it in a small local theater and that added even more to the enjoyment. i related to amy adams and emily blunt in this movie for multiple reasons. and the kid in the movie was incredible. you can't overlook alan arkin as well. he must like being in movies with the word "sunshine" in them. the two sisters start a business cleaning up after crime scenes. despite the gruesomeness of the job, they find beauty in the darkness. here's an example. sheer awesomeness.

i tweet and i like it

2009-04-21T05:13:00.000-07:00

last night at work i explained to a co-worker about twitter and how i got messages sent to my cell phone. i've been on it almost as long as i've been on facebook. i follow a ton of celebrities and i follow all of my friends that i am aware of that on there. i'm addicted to text messaging and random thoughts. it's a neat place to send them and i honestly feel sorry for my "followers." it is fun that i follow "harry potter" and janet jackson. i mean, really. and it has been an amazingly easy way for me to keep up with my friends.

i don't quite take it this far...

if you are the only one on earth....

2009-04-19T05:10:00.000-07:00

...who hasn't seen this, watch it. love her. so i figure i have about 10 years to fulfill at least one dream...

susan boyle on Britain's Got Talent

on my list

2009-04-18T23:01:00.000-07:00

have to see this movie. july 17th. i love joseph gordon leavitt. i like zooey deschanel.

easter weekend 2009

2009-04-18T07:47:00.000-07:00

i spent the weekend with close friends and family. (photos of shelly and nate above) it was amazing. it was exactly what i needed. i was looking for a break from reality and i found it. i went with my friend, maribeth, to her brother, david's church. he said what i needed to hear that i need to work on forgiving myself for my sins. i have a really hard time with that concept. i got the chance to share my camera with shelly's kids, nate, daryl, and keara. they took some awesome photos very indicative of their individuality. it was one of the best ideas i've had in ages. they also took videos. awesome.

i also got a chance to spend an evening with my brother, mike. maribeth took me and mike on a tour of poquoson, photos below. then, i came back to maryland the next day to spend the evening with sara and her family. i really do not know how i could possibly feel more loved. there were just moments of sheer perfection this weekend. i am very lucky to be surrounded by love. i often take it for granted. i can only hope i give out as much as i receive...if not, i'm working on it. there are not many things you can count on in life. i am very lucky that i know who and what i can count on.

easter photos (with people)
easter random obscure photos

happy 30th birthday, sara!

2009-04-02T07:59:00.000-07:00

she didn't want me to post this...but i'm not known for listening.

happy birthday, dad!

2009-04-02T07:49:00.000-07:00

today is my father's birthday. he is one of the most amazing people on earth. i wish i could be more like him.

crazy retail story

2009-03-24T08:29:00.001-07:00

i've been in retail a long time. i'm used to people calling for a manager and yelling at me about something completely out of my control. i was unprepared for this woman's story.

she started the story off by saying, "i'm sure this is a bit too personal, but...."

apparently, she does not sit on the toilet seat while using public restrooms. while she had her pants down, she spotted a pink cell phone coming from underneath the adjacent stall. it was opened, ready to take a photo. she was unable to get her pants back on quickly enough to physically catch the young woman, but she yelled "hey" resulting in the girl's quick getaway.

then, she comes to find me... i could not believe my ears. she was angry that she couldn't catch the girl. i literally had to chase her around the store to fill out an incident report. mostly, she was worried about this photo showing up on the internet. if it were to happen to me, i would have grabbed the phone.

by far, one of the craziest stories i've heard from a customer.

passive aggressive

2009-03-19T07:55:00.000-07:00

passive-aggressive (-ə gres′iv)
adjective

PSYCHOL. designating or of a personality, a person, or behavior characterized by disguised resistance to the demands or expectations of others, that is expressed in hindering progress, as by procrastination, stubbornness, or inefficiency

Webster's New World College Dictionary Copyright © 2005 by Wiley Publishing, Inc., Cleveland, Ohio.
Used by arrangement with John Wiley & Sons, Inc.

apparently, i've been told that i am passive aggressive. based on this definition, i definitely am passive aggressive. i came across a book in the humor section of my store with examples of this behavior. the following story would definitely be included.

there was a car violating the unwritten rule in our neighborhood concerning parking. they were usurping our and our neighbor's space. one morning i was greeted by a note on the white ford escort that was the culprit....

"it is an unwritten rule in this neighborhood that these parking spots are for the homeowners. It is one thing to park there if necessary for a short time, but we do not appreciate it that every time we pull out you not only pull in, but remain parked there for days on end. I really hate to be petty, but this is the only spot we have to park in that's in front of our house and if you could please park your car somewhere else that would be fantastic. Thank you very much."

here was the response...

"Thank you for the note. I actually live here to & the only time I park here is when someone takes away the parking area in front of the house where I live just like last night. Sorry for the inconvenience. P.S. We should put a sign out for parking spaces."

the response was actually left in our doorway...we returned the note and response to our neighbors. no more white ford escort. i love people

a little snowfall

2009-03-02T06:12:00.000-08:00

to facebook or not to facebook

2009-03-01T07:15:00.000-08:00

the one thing that i didn't mention in this video is my addictive nature. i think i have only managed to stay off of facebook for one day since i have joined. it really taps into my curiosity about people. there's also the "coming out" to everyone from elementary school, junior high and high school in an instant factor that troubles me. it is weird. i'm fairly out, but i like to tell people on my own terms. in accepting a person as a friend, i instantly come out of the closet. no discussion. and i have yet to encounter anyone from my high school that is gay on facebook. twenty year reunion is coming up...and i'm the only one? yeah, right.

i am going to attempt to break the "addiction" to facebook. wish me luck.

i'm not quitting, just slowing down.

i'm not a quitter.

ah coldplay...

2009-02-22T11:21:00.000-08:00

...it reminded me of the genesis video from the 80s. and since we've done puppet shows at work...

mr. chi-city mayne

2009-02-21T21:17:00.000-08:00

sara and i stumbled up this....i had to share. too funny.

age before beauty?

2009-02-13T08:22:00.000-08:00

someone accused me of being an "ageist" the other day and i know they were joking. however, i thought about it more and i thought it was funny. i love all women, young and old. these are a few that i have thought were beautiful forever. i think i could be an ageist when it comes to men...but probably not.

i believe all these women are all older than me....i could be wrong. no need to point it out. they will always be older in my head.

exploring churches

2009-02-09T07:03:00.000-08:00

i've been going to a Metropolitan Community Church for the past five years and i love them. however, i live farther away and i am looking for a different church. i've gone to a few different ones in the past few months.

i actually ran across this church while i was exploring one day and i decided to go this sunday. it was a unitarian church. i have been to a wedding ceremony in a unitarian church, but that was it prior to this experience.

i really enjoyed this service. i felt mildly uncomfortable at first about being the only brown person there, but i got over it quickly. there were several things that popped out at me right away. i miss having kids at church. this church made them part of the service. they actually sang "Seasons of Love" from RENT, my favorite musical. i heard the words "same sex marriage" within the first 10 minutes of the service in connection with the words "standing on the side of love."

it was very peaceful and interractive. the one wall of the church was basically windows looking out into the trees. i loved that. amazing.

the congregation was called upon to share paper hearts and a phrase about the love in their life. pretty awesome. and one woman had been with her partner for over 17 years.

i was definitely led to this church on sunday. i think i will still explore the churches around, but i will come back to this one.

a few photos...

saturday afternoon

saturday night

a look back, a look forward

2009-01-28T19:10:00.000-08:00

i love lists.

here's what i learned in 2008:

1. don't put your resolutions on your blog. if i post a list on here, then i ignore it. if i post a book to read, then i don't finish it. so just look for photos or music i like on here.

2. don't be afraid to connect with new people. i found things within myself that i did not know i possessed and things that i had forgotten. i've reconnected with my past and that's been eye opening as well.

3. God did not move. i did. He just put me down after carrying me for awhile.

4. there are some things worth fighting for and there are some things that must be let go. i'm not good at that.

5. there is purpose for my life. not sure what it is yet, but i am going to enjoy all the life i can until it comes into focus.

6. even though i am getting older, i refuse to settle into what everyone thinks of me as being the only thing going. i have changed. i will keep changing. i will keep challenging myself to be a better person. i will grow until i die.

7. i love people. i really LOVE people. life would be SO boring without them.

8. i am truly blessed. i have spent a good portion of my life not being satisfied by who i am, what i have, or where i am going. that is complete crap. i have been so lucky, been given more than i deserve, and my life has been the most amazing journey.

9. if i have a positive impact on the people that i love, then i've earned my existence here on earth. i just want people to say that i try to be a good person.

10. i am a freak. i am a misfit. i am a square peg trying to fit into a round hole. i am different. i am a weirdo. (see above photo) i am glad, really, really, glad.

11. stop looking within for all the answers. look to God, look to others and pay attention to the clues around you.

12. i am old, but i am not dead. i will do things that i have never done before.

13. i am so glad that my asking questions has brought me closer to people that i would have never known well. i am asking better questions and people are asking me questions back. it has changed my life forever.

14. i feel the most whole and healed than i have felt in a long time. watch out.

and for 2009....

i will not be afraid.

[the photo above is me in the "batcave" with my dark knight display, wearing my special hulk hands that i got for christmas from my friend, maribeth.]

happy new year!

obama inauguration 01.20.09

2009-01-20T16:23:00.001-08:00

it was amazing to be surrounded by such of huge crowd of people who were so excited that Barack Obama is our president. it was incredible to be a small part of such a large part of our country's history.

inauguration photos

work in progress

2009-01-09T08:33:00.000-08:00

Prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury,pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. Amen

i am still sifting through my mind for my final thoughts about 2008 and where i am headed in 2009. however, i had to share this prayer in the meantime. it has saved my life on more than one occasion and i rediscovered it while listening to a Sarah Mclachlan CD. if you haven't heard her sing it, download it right now. this prayer is part of my focus for 2009 in an attempt to be a better person.

just a quick note of news, my friends, elizabeth and james, had their beautiful baby girl, emma, on the 22nd of december. congratulations! i am so happy for them.

maligayang pasko!

2008-12-31T07:22:00.000-08:00

my birthday and Christmas were incredible this year. something about it was different even though i did what i do every year. it was a quick trip down to virginia beach, but it was worth it. i was literally surprised by all my gifts. i even cried opening one of them. i don't do that often. thanks, mary.

the gifts i received this year were extra thoughtful and i amazed by my friends and family. it truly was the year of the Batman. yay, Batman pez dispensers! i received a really cool gift from the cafe staff as well (ask me & i will show you). sara gave me a gift card to the movies, so i could spend time with friends. (and for movies that she has no interest in seeing). and maribeth finished off the gift-giving this past saturday with a special edition pair of HULK HANDS!!!!

i am truly thankful for all the gifts i've received. however, i'm more grateful for the presence of the people i love in my life. i didn't have enough money to buy everything i wanted for people so i created an album of what i would give if money or reality was not an option...i didn't have time to finish it...but i did what i could.

merry christmas!!

it's the thought that counts...

christmas/birthday celebration

wii weekend and more...

2008-12-10T09:02:00.000-08:00

we hosted our friends, jen and danielle, for a night of wii games and pizza. this is the closest i came to taking real photos of the event. i try to be nice to people sometimes if they don't like photos taken. however, in the albums below, i was not that nice. we had a good time that evening and it ended shockingly with me asking questions. believe it or not, they didn't go running for the hills. i was very impressed. they may choose to never visit again, but i am glad they made the trip this time.

the links below are photos of events that have taken place recently...enjoy.

amy's baby shower & visit to the johnsons

turkey day event

thanksgiving 2008

beedle and the bard event

holiday party

happy tenth anniversary, sara!

2008-11-23T20:25:00.000-08:00

happy anniversary, sara! there are more than a hundred reasons why i love you, but usually i can only come up with three. click the link to see one of your presents....TEN TIMES TEN.

when sparkling looks like sweat?!?

2008-11-23T06:57:00.000-08:00

everyone knows that i was excited to see this movie. everyone that has talked to me in the last few months knows that i really love the characters in this book. "twilight" is my favorite book in this series. i would have never read the other three if i hadn't fallen in love with bella and edward.

i know that a movie will never match what your imagination creates from reading. however, some movies are able to come close. this is not one of them.

a teenager walking out of the theater said it best, "i didn't think this was supposed to be a comedy."

walking humbly

2008-11-21T06:29:00.000-08:00

i've had the opportunity to actually go to church a few times within the last month or so. the days where i used to go to mass every sunday seems a really long time ago. in the last five years, i have struggled with a faith that always seemed to be constant and strong within me. with the help of prayer and connection with friends and family, i have rediscovered a peace that i thought i had lost.

i went to church with my friend, kourtney, a couple of sundays ago. i have not been hugged as much in one setting since college. it was nice. i felt very welcomed. it was a non-denominational christian church. the music, which i loved, was an integral part of the service. i had to get up and introduce myself (with a microphone) as a guest to the church. then, kourtney warned me, "they are all going to hug you now." this might bother some people, but not me.

i have been struggling with how to deal with forgiveness of self, forgiveness of others and with various relationships in my life. the sermon was about how one's innermost self does battle with one's outermost self. God is found within your innermost self and it is a conscious decision to let God affect your actions or your outer self. i know that there are moments that i am moved by God to do or to say things to others. i know that comes from deep within me. i know that i am an instrument and a vessel in other people's lives. and i know that certain people are brought into my life as instruments as well.

however, there are emotions that affect my decisions and actions that are not always Christ-like. i struggle with anger, selfishness, and jealousy. i struggle with being overly competitive and with a strong desire to be loved. i know that when i focus on listening to God that i tend to fight the more negative nature of my personality. i do fight the negativity within me with a strong desire to be a better person. i am constantly on the journey to having my faith be what drives my decision making and to let go of my constant need for control. there have been clear examples in my life where God has shown me that i am not in charge, that i needed to let go of the wheel.

a long time ago, i heard a sermon that pointed out that you may be the only example of a Christian that someone might encounter. this thought really resounded with me. i've applied this thought to other aspects of my personality, being a lesbian, being a filipino, and even being a gay Christian. i could easily wear outward symbols to make it obvious that i'm all these things. it would make for an interesting outfit, t-shirt, or tattoo. i've been told by some that my orientation and my heritage are obvious without wearing rainbow-colored flannel or speaking tagalog while frying fish.

is my being a Christian as obvious to others? truly, i'm not sure. hopefully, it will be one day.

happy birthday, maribeth!

2008-11-05T07:33:00.000-08:00

i've known maribeth for over ten years, but feel like i've known her all my life. she is just one of those types of friends. there are very few people in my life that accept me as completely and unconditionally for who i am, good and bad, like she does. i can say absolutely anything to her and she does not judge me, she loves me more. we spent a part of my last visit with her talking about we see each other and how others view us. as different as we may seem to others, we are pretty much the same inside. we do not look alike. we do not act alike. we do not sound alike. we definitely don't laugh alike. but we do love the people in our lives with the whole of our being exactly the same way. if you make it into our hearts, you will own a piece of it for life.

we drift in and out of each others lives when we need each other most. i truly have no walls when it comes to her. you do not come across friends like that very often. if you don't have at least one friend with whom you never have to edit your words or actions, then you are missing out. i am very blessed to have her in my life. she has always been there when i needed her. and i truly don't know what i would do without her. she is truly and utterly amazing. and if you know her, i know you think so too. i love you very much. happy birthday, maribeth!

it's a new dawn, it's a new day

2008-11-05T07:07:00.000-08:00

i heard the news in a tearful voicemail from sara, since i was at work and my phone had died. the joy radiated from within and i actually felt hopeful. i announced it over the loud speaker to the one other employee in the store, "hey ron, it looks like we have a new president." i was so proud to be an american at that moment. when strangers look at me initially, some of them don't assume that i was born here. they almost never assume my parents are citizens. i felt truly american yesterday and glad that we made history happen. i am excited by the thought of change and hopeful that the change will come. for once, i think people finally believed that every vote matters.

making a change...

2008-11-04T10:23:00.000-08:00

i love voting. i have voted since i was eighteen years old. i have a couple of friends who are voting for the first time this year. i love the process. and this time, i loved waiting in line to take part in this historic election. i am excited and nervous. not to mention the almighty "i voted" sticker, it may be one of the most powerful stickers out there.

and yet...unlike any other presidential election, i got a free coffee from starbucks and a star-shaped red, white, and blue sprinkled donut from krispy kreme. i love free stuff. i'm a sucker. it was the icing on the cake on a historic morning.

i'm hoping that i bet on the winner. otherwise, we're moving to canada.

an early anniversary trip

2008-11-01T21:11:00.000-07:00

the photos

anniversary day one

anniversary day two

spookTACULAR

2008-10-26T05:55:00.000-07:00

it's amazing how much planning it takes to orchestrate a two hour event. it's amazing how long two hours seem when you aren't wearing a watch. it was a lot of work, but it was a lot of fun. we had a puppet show with aesop's fables rewritten by rakel and acted out by her and anjalee. we WILL definitely have another puppet show. ghost bingo. pumpkin toss. pumpkin says. good times.

there were some technical difficulties like with our pumpkin toss game and the microphones. j.t. may have gotten pummeled with tons of tiny candy bars. however unlike our kids' party a month or so ago, it went off relatively smoothly. we took some cute photos of the kids, but i don't want to post them without the parents' permission. however, the photo of the kids above had the parent in the background and she seemed very happy about the photo being taken. it was my favorite picture from the day. he and his sister came closest to guessing the weight of the pumpkin, so they got to take it home. i wish i could have taken a photo of the expression on his face when he won. it was priceless. it made all the hard work worth it, even just for that one moment.

and i get paid for this.

other photos from the event...my staff is awesome!

why she is MY friend

2008-10-23T08:49:00.000-07:00

this is one of my best friends, maribeth, attempting to jack up her car. she is THIS funny almost all of the time.

"alone. bad. friends. good."

2008-10-21T08:17:00.000-07:00

photos from the trip

i'm not quite sure if you can click the link to see people's comments on the photos, but if you can, you should.

a trip home

2008-10-17T03:29:00.000-07:00

i spent last weekend with my friends in virginia beach. one of my good friends, elizabeth, and her husband, james, are expecting their first child, emma reese, and were hosting a baby shower. it was also an excuse for me to see my other friends during my trip.

the first stop was to see my brother, mike, at his new store in the 'burg. it was across the street from presidential park...the park with the large presidential busts.
and yes, i wanted to go in...but $11.75? nope.

the second stop was to visit my friend, maribeth. i've known her since my office max days. she has a tendency to take me places i have never thought i would go...like to a ballroom dancing class. and no, i didn't dance. it was amazing to watch though. maribeth is an amazing friend and we seem to never run out of things to say to each other.

next stop was my friend, elizabeth's baby shower. it was completely amazing. it was great to see her and her mom. it was good to meet her husband, james, and a tiny bit weird to touch her belly and feel emma. elizabeth is incredible and i miss having her only five minutes away.

i gathered a group to meet for dinner at a restaurant where my friend, steve is a chef. the food was incredible. the laughter was abundant. and i despite how long it had been since i'd seen some folks, we picked up like we had just clocked out yesterday from work. i miss them all very, very much. some time was spent afterwards at a bar in "downtown virginia beach."

sunday morning, i attended the wave church with sara's mom and sister. these days i can't escape church without crying. this was no exception. i was challenged that morning between forgiving and being too forgiving. i don't know where the line is at times. i can walk away, but my heart doesn't completely close. once you are in my heart, no matter where you go physically...you will always reside there. no matter what people do, i have to strive not to harden my heart. i will not close myself off.
i love my friends, family and people too much.

if i stop trusting my instincts about people, i would miss out on having a weekend like this..surrounded by people i love more than i love myself.

i am two hours away from leaving for a trip to new york to see craig. i will post a video blog when i get back. and for those who asked where i was going in my last video (chrissy d), i went to virginia beach to reconnect with some good friends.

project runway: will i watch this show again?

2008-10-17T03:05:00.000-07:00

i'm a little behind because i had to work on Wednesday night and had to watch it on Tivo. and luckily, my friends at work did not tell me who won. otherwise, i may not have watched. i'm been fairly successful at choosing who would win "the big show." usually, it tends to be my favorite. not this time. i wanted korto momolu to win.

i liked leanne. but not as much as korto. i hope she ends up like jennifer hudson and leaves everyone else in the dust. not sure i will watch this show again...but i did watch sheer design again. (i just stopped the first season when my favorite got sent home.) and my favorite from THAT show last season now has her own AWESOME show...Tabitha's Salon Makeover.

first video blog

2008-10-10T08:36:00.000-07:00

it's my first time. i have to figure out to not look like a dork...well, perhaps not AS much of a dork as i usually do.

uh...popcorn?

2008-10-08T05:26:00.000-07:00

Pop Corn téléphone portable micro-ondes
Uploaded by sassiere

this sadly is something that i would do with my friends. i would probably proceed to drink heavily afterwards after realizing what would happen to my brain due to my many years of cell phone use. yikes.

a surprise date

2008-10-02T06:21:00.000-07:00

sara decided to surprise me and take me out to a movie when i got home from work last night. at my urging, i suggested that we see "burn after reading." it wasn't my favorite coen brother movie, but it was enjoyable. obviously, brad pitt was a highlight for me. there will moments in that movie that include him that i will not easily forget. his hair alone was worth the price of admission. i love frances mcdormand. they were quite the dynamic duo. and i have to admit i enjoyed george clooney's performance as well.

lars and the real girl

2008-09-29T08:20:00.000-07:00

these are scenes from "lars and the real girl" set to one of my favorite all-time songs by Ray Lamontagne, "Be Here Now." i love ryan gosling. he is incredible in this movie. i know i say this all the time, but i LOVE this movie. i'm a little late watching it. i've been a little behind, but i love the world that the writer and director create here. i love patricia clarkson with a passion. go rent it. go buy it. just do it, you will not regret it. i promise.

don't watch this whole video...it contains spoilers. watch it after you watch the movie. seriously.

crush: joseph gordon-levitt

2008-09-26T06:35:00.000-07:00

i have watched most of the films he's been in of late. i just watched "stop-loss" last night. "lookout" is the next on my list. i love his voice. i really liked him in "mysterious skin." i get very attached to actors that portray people that are on-the-edge or a tadbit crazy. i like him. he's sexy in a cute kinda way.

really belated birthday wishes

2008-09-20T09:13:00.000-07:00

i'm very behind on the blogging. stacey celebrated her birthday on the 11th of september with me, sara and her mom in williamsburg, va. we made a quick trip down for the day, enjoying colonial food and shopping. we always have a good time when we are together. there is always at least one moment of pure amazing laughter or joy.

stacey is my sister in every sense of the word. i am very proud of her and i can only say that because i've known her since she was sixteen years old. i love hearing the stories she tells about the kids that she teaches in the third grade. i know that she is one person who has found their true vocation in life. she picks on me like a sister. she supports me like a good friend. and she is one of the only people who will understand what it's truly like to live with sara.

i am very blessed to have her in my life. happy birthday, maj!

"were you on top chef?"

2008-09-02T21:04:00.000-07:00

i was shopping at Babies'r us today with sara for a gift for a friend's shower. and the woman from the registry desk sent another employee over to the cash register to ask me, "were you on top chef?"

i've been asked a lot of questions before, but that had to be one of the funniest. i thought for a minute about who she might be referring to...then i responded, "i think she had spikier hair." i laughed the entire way out of the store.

speaking of spikier hair, the woman, Dee, that i wanted to win on Sheer Genius - Season 2 WON!!!! i was pumped. yay! if you look at the photo below, i'm sure you will be shocked by this.

vacation with maj - part one : baltimore zoo

2008-08-30T19:00:00.000-07:00

these entries about my vacation this year are going to be random depending on what photos i can get uploaded to flickr. we all went to the baltimore zoo and these are a few photos. it involved much more than is shown, including a camel ride or two. see photos of sara below. this zoo is only about twenty minutes away from us and it had some pretty unique animals. it was a lot of fun and had animals we had never seen before. the photos of me on a camel will not be making their way to the internet. i've also been informed that i skipped the nationals game we went to first. more photos coming soon.

strange nicknames, good friends & weird week

2008-08-27T06:18:00.000-07:00

i am way behind in trying to keep this blog updated. i have a whole week of a really cool vacation to share with everyone, but i'm a little behind. however, this week has been unique starting with seeing a batmobile replica parked in front of my store. and all i could think, "WHERE THE HELL IS MY CAMERA?" i had brought it to work for the two days prior and left at home that day. i took some shots with my cell, but it is not the same.

i spent sunday afternoon scrapbooking with two of my really good friends, christine and danielle. after months of trying to get together, we finally managed to see each other. it was fun having them over to the house and especially fun watching danielle try guitar hero. it seems that the scrapbooks might never be finished, but it's a really good excuse to see each other.

on monday, i watched my boss get fired. i'm still in shock. as people close to me know, i have been battling with this man for over a year. i almost walked off the job because of him. i honestly can't believe he's really gone. please pray that his replacement is better. it's been a really long year.

last night, i got to break bread with some amazing friends whom i don't get to see near enough. apparently, jen reads my blog to keep up with me as she travels all over the continental United States. thus, today's entry felt necessary. this is another occasion where i said to myself, "WHERE THE HELL IS MY CAMERA?" jen has blessed me with one of my strangest nicknames, "fire hydrant." apparently, in my youth, i was no taller than the fire hydrants on virginia tech's campus. it was really good to see her and all my friends last night. if you would have told me back in the day that i would still be friends with people from college, meet their husbands/wives, share photos of their kids, i probably would not have believed you. i'm glad i was wrong. there is something amazing about being around people who have known you over ten years.

i was walking around the mall where we met before dinner and thought that i would never really have the money to spend there. i felt poor for a minute. however, i am rich in the things that really matter. i have more than i deserve in a lifetime. end cheesiness.

since i did not have my camera AGAIN, i have to leave you with a internet photo of jen's favorite dishes...chicken shawarma. and jen, the picture text challenge is on!!!!

for all the new people reading my blog, please excuse my grammar. and trust that if the entry is grammatically correct, sara has read it. :)

LeRoi Moore 1961-2008

2008-08-20T06:15:00.000-07:00

Leroi Moore was one of the founding members of the Dave Matthews Band. He passed away from complications resulting from an accident that occurred in June at his home in Charlottesville, VA. He was an amazing saxophonist. I personally will miss wondering what was going on behind his sunglasses that he wore on stage most nights. I am very glad that we were able to see him perform this summer. It's a sad day for Dave fans. He will be missed.

for fun & due to slackness

2008-08-15T16:53:00.000-07:00

thanks shelly!

i've been slacking, but we did a lot on vacation. but i did see "Dark Knight" for a second time today. it was even better the second time. i WILL find it in IMAX next with my buddy, Omeed.

i love batman.

tween extravaganza

2008-08-03T06:25:00.000-07:00

the other night we hosted a midnight release party for "Breaking Dawn" by Stephenie Meyer. despite my concern that no one would show up, we had a fair showing of pre-teen girls a.k.a. tweens. i was pleasantly surprised. you have no earthly idea what kind of work is involved for one of these things, but the hard work totally paid off.

i was amazed by how much these girls have invested in this series of books. i have read these books myself and i have also heavily invested in these characters. however, i could not answer the trivia questions that were asked about these books to save my life. they also fiercely debated over who the main girl, Bella, should choose as her boyfriend. it was a debate over vampires versus werewolves.

i led the werewolf side, the underdog, so to speak. i lost. it was terrible. so much for all those years on the debate team. (i was never that good.)

the attendants made the evening a lot of fun. they came in costume. they decorated t-shirts. i've never seen people get so excited about stickers, buttons and t-shirts. the staff had a good time and i'm very lucky that they are all so willing to participate and help without much question. there were so many cute moments throughout the evening. one of the tweens even wrote a cute note to one of the male members of the staff and colored him a picture. i won't even go into what was written on the "graffiti wall." we also raffled off the duplicated book covers that rakel and i created for decoration. (the photo above is the line for the raffle) the high pitch sound of tween girls counting down to midnight is something i will not easily forget. and we only got one complaint...from an adult.

i had a really good time celebrating a series of books that has come to an end.

i haven't read it yet. so don't tell me what happens.

dark knight

2008-08-01T05:04:00.000-07:00

i have been slacking off in the blog department by not blogging about "Dark Knight." i honestly don't know what i can say. the movie speaks for itself. if you haven't gotten a chance to see it, GET IN YOUR CAR RIGHT NOW AND DRIVE TO YOUR NEAREST THEATRE!!!
i loved this movie. i loved the first "Batman" with Michael Keaton, directed by Tim Burton. it was my favorite Batman movie....not anymore.

Heath Ledger was amazing. There are no words. There were so many moments of "Oh My God!" in that movie related to what he did in this role. He could not have played the part better. He redefined the Joker by being as insane as the character is in the comic book. I am truly sad that I will only be able to see him play that role again. I honestly got upset when he said he could do the dance forever. Legendary.

Christian Bale. Aaron Eckhart. Gary Oldman. Michael Caine. Morgan Freeman. Maggie Gyllenhaal.

Incredible.

Turn off your television. Lock your door. Leave your life for a couple of hours and visit Gotham City. You will not regret it.

molly and matt

2008-07-23T06:54:00.000-07:00

on the 18th, we attended the beautiful wedding of molly and matt at meadowlark botanical gardens. they made the HUGE mistake of asking me to take photos. these are just a few put to the music of Tim McGraw. they had a very intimate wedding with close family and friends. the ceremony was simple and utterly amazing. i had a great time taking photos and being able to share their wonderful day. the reception was hosted by matt's family at Clyde's and the cake was incredible.

and to make this one of the best wedding days ever, they decided that we should see "The Dark Knight" to finish off the day. honestly, i'm not sure if they enjoyed the movie as much as i did. i am VERY glad that they chose to go to the movie. i will be posting what i thought about the movie at a later date. i'm hoping to see it a second time....

congrats molly and matt!

i've been warned

2008-07-08T19:52:00.000-07:00

i recently took a road trip with sara and her family to lock haven, pennsylvania. this was our second trip to pennsylvania this summer. we attended a wedding of one of sara's childhood friends. i thought it was a lot of fun, and it was amazing that i was invited as sara's date. ruth and ryan seemed to be a very fun couple and their daughter was beautiful. it was fun to watch sara and her family dance the night away. and my distaste for the mullet hairstyle on women was reinforced strongly. if i ever rock the mullet, please shave my head bald immediately.

the next day we traveled to hershey, pennsylvania to visit the chocolate factory. i was actually kinda weird about taking my photo with the giant kitkat bar, but sara volunteered to join me and i did it. i have never seen so much chocolate in one place. i enjoyed the ride through the "factory" that talked about how the chocolate was made. i know, i'm a geek. it reminded me of watching food network. and they gave away free chocolate. nice. if you have kids or are a big kid like me, then you must go.

according to sara, i always say "a fun time was had by all." well, it WAS fun. it's always good to hang with stacey and mary. they even put up with a stop at wegman's on the way home. i had to mention it. i'll spare you the photos.

a visit from one of our favorite families

2008-06-21T04:32:00.000-07:00

we got the chance to see some amazing friends yesterday on their east coast tour for the first time in about five years. i am so glad that we got to spend time together. we got a chance to see their son, Nicholas again and to meet their daughter, Elena for the first time. Nicholas is going to be taller than me in about five minutes and Elena thoroughly had me charmed with her cuteness. it was great to spend time with Christine, Eddie and the kids.

my favorite moments:

1. holding Elena :)

2. watching Christine's face light up like a Christmas tree when she realized that Sara's dissertation topic was directly related to her work (i'm glad someone knows what it means)

3. hearing Eddie making snoring sounds in response to Christine's excitement :)

4. having Nicholas ask for a "feast" from the waitress (i think i have to steal that line :) )

i wished that they lived closer and it was incredible to see them. Christine and I have known each other for a long time...longer than some of my employees have been alive. she amazes me. i love her and her family. it was good to see them all happy.

even though we are both incredibly bad at keeping in touch with each other, i'm glad that she knows that i love her and that i'm blessed to know her. and if she doesn't know, she does now.

concert in the mountains

2008-06-18T07:09:00.000-07:00

i didn't take this photo of the concert that we went to last week. it was from "The Times-Tribune" on June 12, 2008 and was taken by Pamela Suchy. i didn't try to take a camera into the venue, although i must have been the only one to make that decision. we went to Scranton, PA for our annual Dave Matthews Band show. we had chosen this site because Paolo Nutini was supposed to open...didn't happen. however, despite the rain and the major hike up the mountain, the show was pretty amazing. the last song of the night was my favorite - "Thank You" by Sly and the Family Stone. Dave danced around like a maniac and that's why i still like him. i can only watch him live once a year, but i still like him.

on the way home from Scranton, PA, we made a stop at Steamtown National Historical Site. if you like trains, you will love this place.
i took a lot of photos and we were able to take a short train ride operated by one of the first diesel engines. if you have kids who are into trains or are a kid at heart like me, you will enjoy this spot. i'm a dork. i loved it.i think my favorite part of our trip was going to my first Wegmans grocery store. it was grocery heaven. i have never seen a store so clean, so big. i took photos. i will find the closest one to me. i promise you. this should be the standard for grocery stores. i love all grocery stores in general, but this was an experience.

beer with my take out? seriously? c'mon.

i miss the toy store

2008-06-06T15:47:00.000-07:00

i just watched "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium" the other night. i hadn't had the chance before this but, my friend, joy insisted that i watch it. i absolutely know why she did. it reminded me so much of my old job at Store of Knowledge. i loved that place. i love toys and i love watching kids play with toys. i believe i still get that look on my face when i see some toy that i think is cool.

just ask sara about how i act when i come across the newest set of "Hulk Hands" at Target. i want a pair of those. badly. i miss that store and the people. toys rule.

an evening with chuck palanhiuk

2008-06-04T04:41:00.000-07:00

i went to an amazing reading by chuck palanhiuk last night with my friends, c.j. and nick. (all thanks to Sara :) ) he's an author that i've loved since my days at Store of Knowledge. an employee told me that i should read "Fight Club" before watching the movie and i was hooked. when i started working at Borders, i debated internally about my first "Staff Selection." it was "Fight Club." i did get some interesting comments about it. i knew it said something interesting about me to people who know what his books are about. and that book is one of his tamer ones.

he approaches subjects that are offensive, incendiary, and socially taboo. he creates characters who wear their flaws on their sleeves and relish in them. his characters stand apart from a world into which they will never fit. there is always a duality and struggle within each of them. i think that is what i relate to most. misfit. outside.

when i was talking about posting this, i didn't necessarily want it to follow yesterday's post. how can i go from talking about God to talking about a man whose latest book is about the porn industry? the picture of him above is as he is throwing out blow up dolls and he threw out earplugs to the crowd in case they were easily offended. i won't even go into what the bookmarks had attached.

obviously, there are many sides to everyone. sexuality is a part of my spirituality. the more i've discovered who i am, the closer i became to God. i am not ashamed of my sexuality or my faith. i've recently been asked how can i be gay and still be a Christian. and i've been asked why bother being Christian if you are gay.

i connect to the duality of the characters in chuck palanhiuk's books, the complexity of their struggles. i've always struggled with the feeling of not fitting into this world. i am not the labels, the stereotypes. i'm not a typical example of the minority groups to which i belong. i am finally figuring out that i don't i need to fit in anymore. i just have to be me, like it or not.

God don't make junk.

God's playlist for me

2008-06-03T03:38:00.000-07:00

I've mentioned in a previous blog entry that I'm struggling with my faith. I've been struggling with where I should go to church and how rarely I get to go to church at all. For people who have known me for any length of time, my faith in God has been inherent and without question. I am not questioning whether God exists in my life. I am completely surrounded by how God has blessed me. I have never had a problem seeing Him in other people and in the journey of my life. What I'm struggling with is the connection I have with Him personally...where is the God in me? This is NOT a plea for compliments! You could tell me over and over that you see God working through me, but I need to find that again myself. I feel like I've been ignoring a really good friend for a LONG, LONG time and I'm having our first really awkward conversation on the phone to reconnect. I made that call yesterday and actually requested a mix CD.

I prayed that God pick the songs that He wanted me to hear as it randomly shuffled on my Nano. I don't listen to lyrics. I am not like Sara or Craig who can quote and memorize lyrics. I just like songs, how they make me feel. I connect to God through music. However, I listened to the words yesterday. It was amazing.

I listened to the love songs as if the love involved God's love, something I learned from a friend. It works with some songs, not all.

I listened to the entire song and did not skip.

I devoted the entire drive to work to spending time listening to what God wanted me to hear. I was so intent on this that all of a sudden the "low tire pressure" indicator light started flashing and I realized that I had past my exit to work. It went off as I turned around. The light has come on before, but it has never flashed like that. It was weird.

I am still thinking about what I am taking away from what I heard. Oddly enough, I feel closer. The songs on the playlist are in the order that I heard them. I will blog later about what I took from them. The message from some songs were obvious. Shockingly, I'm still analyzing what some of them mean to me. The last song made me laugh because Weezer is a band a friend is trying to get me into and they released a new CD today. Feel free listen to them on the right.

I have decided to devote my time alone in the car to prayer and to opening myself back up to God.

"Be still and know I am God." Psalm 46:10

just another reason

2008-05-26T06:35:00.000-07:00

i have to work all memorial day weekend, not too surprising. on a normal day when i come home and dinner is made, i REJOICE. i LOVE it. it could be hot dogs or a ham sandwich. if i didn't have to make it, it doubles the value of the food. i love cooking, but it can be hard to muster the energy after a long day at work.

yesterday i came home to a "picnic" meal created by sara, accompanied by a frozen margarita. INCREDIBLE. food and ALCOHOL? amazing. she didn't want me to miss out on the holiday that everyone else gets to celebrate for three days.

take a piece of advice from me... it's the smallest things that make the biggest impression.

5 dollar not-so-fun

2008-05-16T05:28:00.000-07:00

i am a big ross mathews fan. i read his blog daily whenever possible and one of the things he does with his friend, nikki, is called "5 dollar fun." they shop in a random store and spend five dollars on each other. in a fit of boredom, sara suggests that we try this game. i chose the store...toys'r us.

i don't know if anyone is familiar with the "James Brown" incident circa 2003, but i should NEVER be allowed to choose a gift for Sara without some guidance. needless to say, i don't think sara will give into her boredom in this way again.

sara was pretty successful in her quest for something i would like....

how cool was that stuff? all for under five dollars. well, this is what SHE got...

believe it or not, this gem left me with $1.02 in change left over. i was sadly convinced that she liked spiderman. how can you go wrong with a spiderman potato head?

by buying for sara.

i'll be returning it.

maybe.

moms rule!

2008-05-11T19:10:00.000-07:00

i love my mom. i love sara's mom.
i love all my friends who are moms.
here's a tribute to some of the moms i know and their beautiful kids.
thanks for doing one of the hardest jobs on earth.

song by scissor sisters -"take your mama"

family, shopping & a grill

2008-05-07T05:31:00.000-07:00

sara's mom and sister came to visit this past weekend to do some shopping for us and for the house. it was a fun weekend filled with new clothing for all. i was in desperate of need of clothes that fit. i was out and about with sara and noticed a woman wearing clothing that i may have picked for myself. it became painfully obvious that i need all the fashion guidance these women provide me. if i were left to my own devices, i would be in flannel shirts with batman t-shirts underneath, three sizes too large. good thing that these people love me.

we moved onto the more fun purchase of the day.....a grill. oh yeah. we have propane, houston. the neighborhood better be aware. good, good times. a lawnmower. a grill. a batcave. who knew?

yeah, that's an apron. what up? say something.

pure coolness

2008-05-03T05:23:00.000-07:00

thanks maj...for the gift.
thanks sara...for making it.
thanks batman and legos....for pure awesomeness.

i don't like being angry

2008-04-29T04:41:00.000-07:00

i hate getting angry. i do everything in my power to avoid that emotion. i don't think that i had good role models growing up to teach me how i should deal with it properly. i don't think i've worked in a place that has brought that out in me as often as this one. i'm more disappointed than angry about something that happened at work last night. it's become painfully clear that i garner no respect at all. as a result of two employees actions, i got "flaming pissed," as a friend would say. in most situations, i would walk out and not turn back to avoid saying anything i would regret. (the "run away, run away" solution) i cannot do that at work. i just did what i had to do and left as quickly as possible. one employee was actually brave enough to ask me why i was mad. and for once, i told him directly.

i'm learning to do that more often. i'm not good at facing what makes me angry. i've never been able to confront a boss about my disappointment or anger. i have done that in this job.
last night, i was able to tell the one employee why i was pissed right after it happened. usually i will tell everyone ELSE why i'm mad, then i will tell the person i was mad at directly ten years down the road. i'm getting much better at telling people directly. it's pretty scary.

there are VERY few people i will yell at or argue with directly. i can count them on one hand.
i don't like who i become when i get angry. it is not a nice person. i'm working on it. watch out.

an evening with laura & the boys

2008-04-26T06:21:00.000-07:00

music by the flaming lips "yoshima battles the pink robots pt. 2"

sara and i hosted our friend, laura and her two boys, noah and gavin last evening. i'm glad to say that the "batcave" seems to appeal to the under 12 y.o. age group. between the pizza, chips and the wii, i think we were able to keep the boys amused. however, i think i enjoyed playing with the legos the most myself. i forgot how fun it was to build things and then completely demolish them. it was good to see laura and spend time with the boys. they are amazing. they promised to bring over guitar hero the next time....

are we our cats?

2008-04-17T04:16:00.000-07:00

i am up way too early. i shouldn't be blogging, but i know one is way overdue. sara and i joke around about this all the time. so i thought i would actually consider the concept in writing that she embodies "Grace" and that i embody "Cooper."

Why Grace is like Sara:
1. Grace loves to groom. Sara is very tidy and loves to clean.
2. Grace is taller than Cooper. Sara is taller than me.
3. Grace is affectionate when she is in the mood. So is Sara.
4. Grace makes her needs clearly known. Sara is very honest and direct.
5. Grace does not like going to the vet. Sara does not like going to the doctor.
6. Grace does not enjoy taking medication at all. Neither does Sara.
7. Grace is a daredevil. Sara wants to try skydiving one day.
8. Grace likes to nap on the couch. Sara likes napping on the couch.
9. Grace pretends to be annoyed with Cooper, but loves him. (I am annoying.)
10. Grace loves me for some unknown reason. So does Sara.

Why Cooper is like me:
1. Cooper grooms, but it is not a pastime. I shower as quickly as possible.
2. Cooper is very affectionate. I love hugs.
3. Cooper is extremely predictable. I shock no one.
4. Cooper is a small cat. I am a short person.
5. Cooper is an instigator. I love to push buttons.
6. Cooper loves the "BatCave." I love the the "BatCave." (my basement)
7. Cooper is a little bit clumsy. And we all know how I love to trip and fall. Doh!
8. Cooper hides from strange people. I would, if I had a choice.
9. Cooper loves to play with toys. I mean, seriously?
10. Cooper loves Sara. Me too.

obviously, i love my cats.

i woke up way too early this morning.

the new place

2008-04-07T07:08:00.000-07:00

here are a few photos of the new place. i thought i would post the photos that i took prior to moving in to entice people to come and visit to see it decorated. sara and her mom were in charge of decorating primarily. however, i got to decorate the basement. i'm sure you can only imagine. it has officially been dubbed the "batcave."

the move was crazy, but worth it for multiple reasons. if anyone has been to where we were living before, then you will truly appreciate how the new place is way more fun.

sara and my dad both celebrated birthdays this past week and i'll post some photos later about that.

my friends, joy and cain, have created a blog for their little girl, lennon. the photos are way too cute...Lemon 'n Dill.

a sandwich story

2008-03-29T04:57:00.000-07:00

while i was home for Easter, my brother, mike, and i went out to a small italian pastry shop for lunch. i enjoyed a canolli and an incredible caramel latte. i watched my brother devour a grilled prosciutto, tomato, and fresh mozzarella sandwich on focaccia bread. by the end of the meal, i HAD to order a sandwich to go for later in the evening.

i ate half of the sandwich later that night and left the rest wrapped up in the fridge in a brown paper bag. i spent most of the next day with sara and her family. i got home pretty late and opened the fridge looking for the sandwich. it was GONE!

i was disappointed, but i figured that my brother may have gotten hungry. not a big deal.

i woke up the next morning and asked mike about it. he raised up his hands and said "it wasn't me." he had come home the day before and my mom was in the middle of eating it. she turned to him and asked, "is this yours?" he says no. then she asks, "do you think she'll mind?" mike just walked away.

so i wait until the sign of peace in the middle of Easter mass to quietly ask my mom, "so, was the sandwich good?" and her first reaction was to wave and point toward both her and my father. not only did she eat my sandwich without asking, she also throws my dad under the bus without a second thought. it was a classic mom moment.

if i could have laughed out loud in church, then i would have laughed until i cried. i love my mom. if you have met her, this story will mean more. but if you haven't met her, you should.

the culprits

letting go and letting God

2008-03-21T22:20:00.000-07:00

i spent part of my morning on the beach just taking photos of random things. i grew up at the beach. honestly, i took it for granted. i used to go down there when i needed to find myself and to connect with God. the easter season has always brought me closer to God in the past. i loved lent and appreciated the importance of sacrifice during that time. for the last couple of years, easter has come and gone without that closeness. i still am struggling with it. however, i am glad that the struggle exists. i haven't given up on finding the strong connection that i know i can have with God. this easter has been different. i know i'm on the road to finding the strength that i've lost. i know i'm not alone on the journey. i am working on letting go and letting God. i've not very good at it, but i'm trying.

happy easter!

say hello to lennon adel

2008-03-20T18:44:00.000-07:00

my friends, joy and cain, welcomed their little girl, lennon adel, into the world on march 19th.
how cute is she?!!

cupcakes & birthdays

2008-03-16T19:20:00.000-07:00

i got the chance to hang out with my friend Virginia yesterday after work. even though the outing was a WAY belated celebration of her birthday, she brought ME a present. i think my obsession with pandas is becoming very obvious to all. most of my friends seem to remember what i like since i am so very vocal about it. this panda is very cute. we had a good time devouring cupcakes from cake love. it was very good to see her.

today is my friend, anjalee's birthday. we met a relatively short time ago, but we have become good friends pretty quickly. she is currently stuck with me as her boss, and she makes her daily mission to make me feel VERY OLD. she's been through quite a bit in her life, and we have a lot in common (though unlike me, she's a complete badass...piercings and all). happy birthday, anj! (she's the one in the middle)

on an unrelated note, sara and i are moving to yet another city (same state) no one recognizes by its name. however, when i told one person, they responded, "isn't there a prison there?" we are in the process of packing up all of our earthly belongings and getting rid of stuff that has been deemed "unnecessary." i'm not a huge fan of change, but i am able to adapt pretty quickly. we're renting a townhouse. for the first time ever, we will have a basement, and i have claimed decorating rights. :) i'm thinking a movie/music theme. we'll see. i'm nervous and excited. no more waking up to the sounds of "squeak squeak squeak" from the neighbors above. no more fighting for a washer or dryer. no more having to park a block and a half away and bring groceries up the stairs. good times.

who will be first in line?

2008-03-09T05:49:00.000-07:00

you know who. i mean, seriously?

leap year celebration: happy birthday, molly!

2008-03-05T05:58:00.000-08:00

this photo of molly is a very small example of how much joy she gets out of life. molly was born on february 29th and this is the first year that i've been able to celebrate her birthday with her. molly and sara have been friends since high school and i'm very glad that i've gotten to know her. she's an elementary school teacher and i would have loved to have had her as a teacher. she's a ton of fun and who else could come up with a nickname like "anntastic?" molly is incredible and truly in a class by herself.

we started off at build-a-bear workshop, where they awarded her a free bear for her "bearthday." connie, our lovely bear assistant, allowed molly to put 7 hearts in her bear (one for each of us in attendance plus one for her birthday). it was fun to watch the process. then, we headed to clyde's restaurant for a very nice dinner. and ended the evening with a rising game of drunken balderdash. it was a fun way to celebrate the leap year. happy 7th birthday, molly!

moms, babies & robert

2008-02-25T07:38:00.000-08:00

i spent some quality time on friday night with these three beautiful kids, darryl, keara & nate. they are my friend, maribeth's grandkids. the evening was spent with them, their mom, shelly and christine. lots of wine was imbibed (mostly by maribeth and i), some amazing food was consumed (thanks shelly) and laughter was abundant. i always know that when i spend time with maribeth that i will be laughing uncontrollably at some point throughout the evening. her laugh is her signature and one day i will get it on video. the kids were incredible. i'm sure that you can tell by this photo that they were pretty fun. so i spent that evening with three moms and three kids...and almost three bottles of wine. good good times.

the next morning, i spent the morning with my mom shopping. i got to spend more time with her this trip than i normally do on these quick trips down. i love my mom. she has the perfect way to ask a question that can burn and sting at the same time. now, it just makes me laugh. she really is amazing. and i'm glad that i've grown up enough to enjoy every single minute that i spend with her.

the reason i came down was to surprise my friend, joy at her baby shower. she and cain are having their first child and this seriously was the biggest baby shower that i've been to. they shut a filipino restaurant down and it was a pretty huge event.
i am not surprised by this at all. joy is by far one of the coolest people on earth. she is capable of amassing a bazillion friends, but making them all feel like they are completely special to her. she actually sent me a photo text of a building shaped like batman one day. she does stuff like that for everyone. i miss her a lot, but i love that i can just call her at any given time (like when i'm shopping in a store i think she'll love) and she'll talk to me like i saw her five minutes ago. and i'm not writing this just because she told me she started reading this blog. :) i think she knows how i feel. i am so excited that she's becoming a mom. she is going to be amazing....the coolest mom in school. cain is super cool as well...i could just tell by how he looked at joy and how happy they looked together.

i left the baby shower and spent the remainder of the evening with my friend, robert. not a mom, but he does love kids. he's planning to become an elementary school teacher. robert has known me over ten years now. i was accused of having "favorites" at work the other day. he would have classified in that category. and actually, he revealed to me that i upset him once because i called him out on something he did at work. so, even then, even though we may be friends, i will still call you out if you are not doing work...if not more so. i'm sure all of my friends reading this will laugh about their particular "ann yelled at me" stories. i love robert. i needed to see him this trip. he always has been there for me when i need him. beam and coke in hand.

he falls into the second group the type of friends i have...the ones who are very similar to me. people that can talk to anyone and that look for the good in everyone that they meet. this whole weekend i was surrounded by friends who fall into that category. it felt really good and i needed that tremendously. i was with three of the people i feel the most free to be completely myself with at all times. i am very lucky. not many people have those people in their lives. they do not judge what i say or do, no matter how what i say or do. it's freeing. i hope i provide them with that as well. all of my friends i hope.

i ended the weekend at church with my mom, church was amazing. i was able to pray the stations of the cross with my mom. i don't think we've done that before together. it was very powerful. after church, i had brunch with mary and maj, sara's mom and sister. i could have sat with them in the restaurant forever. i miss seeing them everyday. they just make feel good when i'm around them. guess that's what family means.

i started the weekend spending time with maribeth's family, saw the beginning of joy's new family, and ended my weekend with my family.

i am so blessed. sorry the blog is so long. i had so much to say. good times.

love or hate me

2008-02-20T06:53:00.000-08:00

part one:

sara told me that i needed to post something new because she was sick of opening my blog and seeing her face pop up. :) instead, she gets to see the flowers that she received for valentine's day, which was awesome by the way. i took the day off and we went out to breakfast, to see a movie "No Country for Old Men," and had a nice quiet evening at home. it's pretty rare for us to have a day alone together, but even rarer is TWO in a row.

the second day, we actually had company. her friend molly joined us for dinner and to exchange christmas gifts. (yeah, it's been that long.) molly gave me one of the best magnets that i've ever gotten. and everyone is just going have to come over to see it...it's that cool. :)

this is her rabbit, Bunny Foo-Foo. she was being very friendly, thus a photo had to be taken and shared. a good time was had by all and luckily, we get to see molly again really soon. her birthday is on February 29th and this is the first time that we get to go out and celebrate it together...gotta love leap year. i thought my birthday was interesting.

part two:

the reason for the headline was something that came up in discussion with a friend last night. while asking the question, "how do you decide on who you are friends with?" i pointed out that i attract a certain kind of person. i also seem to hire people with very distinct personalities. the people in my life to whom i am closest are very straightforward, chock full of opinions (on everything), and have a "love me or hate me" personality. i have a lot of different types of friends, but this seems to a recurring theme. everyone knows i love quiet people as well, but these folks tend not to be quiet. as a result, i think i've become more direct and have developed opinions that i am actually willing to share. and i am way more comfortable in my skin than i have been in a really long time. i don't think i would ever fully become a "love me or hate me" person, but i do think that i have that within me and i LOVE that about other people.

besides, i'm so indirect with my feelings about things... i need people willing to put a mirror to my face to keep me honest. so, hate on haters.

two words: she passed

2008-02-12T11:00:00.000-08:00

sara found out that she passed her second comprehensive exam today. thus, a second blog for today was necessary. i am so proud of her for so many things...this is just one of them. the wait is over, now she gets to write a dissertation. i sent out a text and i think my favorite response was, "holy shit congrats to her. soon you'll be a doctors wife." thanks for everyone's support and prayers. they were much appreciated.

"wheel in the sky keeps on turning..."

2008-02-12T07:21:00.000-08:00

last night was nathan (far right) and andrew's (in the hat) final night at Borders. they were two of my all-time favorite employees. they were incredible independently, but they were a lot more fun together. they both served as stability to me in their roles.

andrew was always someone i could rely on in the cafe. he is completely brilliant and had a hand in training all of the staff that he's leaving behind. nathan has kept me sane since i got there. i remember him on the day of my interview. he came in early, as he did every day, looked at the daily schedule and chatted with india. he did that everyday. he chatted with everyone. and he always made me laugh. it won't be the same without them. who else is going to play journey on the overhead speaker while the store is open just to make me smile?

there were three people in the break room the day of my interview... two of them are gone. retail can be heartbreaking that way. people come and go really quickly. three people this week alone. i know more are on the way. i am glad that i am friends with so many of the people that i've met at work....past and present. for that, i am truly grateful.

happy birthday, elizabeth!

2008-02-08T05:56:00.000-08:00

i'm a day late, but that shouldn't come as a surprise to many. i'm known elizabeth for over ten years now. we worked together at two different companies...my best retail and worst retail experience. i miss working with elizabeth a lot, but thankfully, she has escaped the world of retail.

i've learned many important lessons from elizabeth.

1. do not judge a book by it's cover. beauty is truly something that comes from within. her outer beauty is only enhanced by her amazingly huge heart. and don't assume that because someone is beautiful they are not intelligent as well.

2. drop everything to be there for a friend. she can't do it so much now that we live four hours apart. but when we lived fifteen minutes apart, she was always there when i needed someone to talk to. and i know that she does that for everyone she loves.

3. don't stop pursuing your goals. if there is something that elizabeth wants to achieve, she will not give up.

4. drive fast sometimes. listen to dave matthews. listen to metallica. laugh out loud.

5. try not to attract stalkers. :) change phone number often.

whether we are close or not, our friendship will be something that i will hold close to my heart. the thought of her will always make me smile. i have so many good memories of her and our times together that there is nothing but an amazing feeling in my heart when it comes to her. she is getting married this month and i am so happy that she has found someone to join her in her path of life. she deserves every moment of happiness. elizabeth has truly helped shape who i am and i love her very much. happy birthday!

"that's so gay"

2008-02-07T05:19:00.000-08:00

(photo by Galen Rowell from savetibet.org)

i'm constantly amazed how easily people use this phrase around me. it's a common phrase. i use it as a joke sometimes if people know about me. usually, it is used more when a person doesn't know i'm a big ol' lesbian. this phrase doesn't really bother me as much as it used to, but people say deeply insulting things quite often without thinking about it.

there are so many things that one doesn't know about a person by just looking at them. you don't know their ethnic background, their sexuality, if they suffer from chronic or mental illness or their history of abuse. it's one thing if someone has the guts enough to ask me, "are you filipino, mexican, or hawaiian?" or "are you gay, straight, or bisexual?" no one is going to ask you "do you suffer from depression, borderline personality, or are you bi-polar?" no one is going to ask if you suffered from mental, physical, or sexual abuse in your past. no one assumes that someone in your family or a close personal friend may be affected by any of these issues.

i actually had to speak to an employee about using the word "spic" while speaking to another employee. i haven't heard that word since the eighties.

just yesterday, a friend said her husband accused her of being "bipolar" during an argument. i'm assuming that he meant to call her "crazy" or "strange," definitely meant as an insult.

when i start somewhere new, i always expect to be confronted with anti-gay sentiment, whether it is intentional or not. "fag." "that's so gay." i can usually tell who will be open and who will not. i'm still amazed how willingly people throw around insults despite who may be listening. no one pays attention to the look on people's faces when they touch a nerve.

i am guilty of making assumptions. we all are guilty of it time to time. i even let people make assumptions about me when it is easier. but i know i do not assume that i know everything about a person after a short amount of time. there are things that people who have known me forever don't know....

i'm a straight, mexican woman with borderline personality.

just ask my girlfriend.

parking wars

2008-02-06T05:03:00.000-08:00

after a weird/bad/stupid day at work, i came home to one of my newest favorite television shows, parking wars on A&E. i love how the meter readers react to their "customers." my favorite part of the show is when cars get "booted." just watch one show and you will be hooked. it definitely takes a special breed to work for the parking authority. this show actually makes it look fun. dangerous, but fun.

i will miss his smile

2008-01-22T20:07:00.000-08:00

i <3 ellen page

2008-01-20T17:16:00.000-08:00

go see "juno." right now. loved it. love ellen page. if you can handle something a little more intense, see her performance in "hard candy." she is amazing. the whole cast in "juno" is excellent.

a day at the museum

2008-01-18T04:23:00.000-08:00

i went downtown the other day to see the Edward Hopper show at the National Gallery of Art. i've seen a lot of Hopper's work, but not this particular painting before and i loved it. it's called "Chop Suey." i loved the content, the use of light and the amazingly vibrant colors. it's been since going to Pittsburgh that i've been in a museum, but moreover, a really long time since i've been alone.

as i was walking around looking at the various pieces in the impressionists' collection, i was listening to Alicia Keys new album on my cd player (the iPod is dead). i felt like i was in a little bubble, immune to interruption and i did not have to interact with another human being if i didn't want to. it was utterly incredible. i don't think i spoke five words during that trip. just to say "thank you" to the woman ringing up my lunch. during lunch, i sat with a notebook and emptied my head of the completely random thoughts that have been filling it.

some people don't understand how i can go places alone and not feel self-conscious. mostly, i don't think people pay attention to people who are alone, unless they are dressed strangely or their behavior attracts attention. i usually am able to blend into a crowd of strangers. if i walk into a room where people know me, it's much harder to go unnoticed.

a museum is easy. a movie theater, very simple. a restaurant...you have to have a book, a laptop or magazine, so it looks like you "intended" to be alone or you'll get the pitying looks. a church, harder if it's small. a concert, easy but i wouldn't do it again. a meeting/room where you are the only minority...sucks.

overall, i think i seem to be unafraid of people looking at me strangely if i'm never really going to see them again. but then again, my friends look at me strangely all the time. so maybe i'm just used to it. i love my partner, my family, my friends and i love spending time with them. but despite what i do for a living, i love NOT interacting with people. i love how i've been spending my time alone these days.

jamie at home

2008-01-14T19:38:00.000-08:00

i got a surprise the other day when sara told me, "jamie oliver has a new show and i tivo'd it for you." this is one of the many reasons i love sara. she puts up with my many likes, dislikes and obsessions.

i've been obsessed with jamie oliver since i caught him late one night on his "naked chef" show. i think he's cute, fun and amazingly hyper about food. of course, i love his accent.

i don't even try to explain why i like some things, but jamie oliver is just plain fun on a stick. he makes me laugh and i made sara save the show she taped until the next one comes on....just in case i need a fix. yeah, it's a sickness. i accept that. i need help.

lift me up

2008-01-10T18:32:00.000-08:00

i go to ross mathews' blog every day..... i love this man. this was on his blog today. he was in a bad mood and his friend, molly cheered him up in this video. all i could do was smile.

my friends do this for me all the time. lift me up. i love the dancing. i love the song. hopefully, i do this for others too. i know i'm a complete goofball. as a friend told me, "i'm just here for the entertainment of others." most of my friends have at least ONE funny ann story.

watch the video. it's worth it. jill scott's "hate on me."

please continue praying for my longtime friend. lift her up.

by a thread

2008-01-07T08:17:00.000-08:00

sara and i went to see the movie, "sweeney todd: the demon barber of fleet street." we both enjoyed it. i could probably watch johnny depp licking stamps for two hours and still be amused. i also love tim burton. no one is shocked.

i think what i got most from it is that your life is like the little drop of water hanging on a thread. things can change in an instant, such that your life will be forever altered. sometimes these things are within your control and sometimes life just slaps you in the face. and in the end, it's all about how you react to these events. brutal murder and melodious singing are not my choices....i think i deal with things with more subtlety. there have been so many moments in my life that have directed my path...words, thoughts, events, and so many people. my droplet has fallen many times, but there has always been a string or two to pick me up.

i spent my saturday, prior to the movie, with three of my really good friends. they have all seen the good and bad side of me. i have known them all for over ten years and yes, they still seem to enjoy spending time with me. they watched me finally finish a scrapbook. we spent the day listening to mix cds that a new friend made me (by force) and talking about the various strings that connect us. they definitely have been strings that have directed my incredible path of life.

good times. hang on.

away from her

2008-01-02T20:03:00.000-08:00

sara asked that i watch this movie before she sent it back to netflix. i had heard about it, but i am SO glad that i watched it. if you are in a silly mood, don't watch it. it is very serious and very sad. i loved this movie. to me.....it's about a love that transcends, but is completely honest about being imperfect. it's about a couple that deals with alzheimer's and everything that entails.

i have always been afraid of my memory issues. i loved the movie "memento," but it freaked me out for days and days. apparently, someone else is also concerned about my memory because i received the "brain game" for christmas. it was a developed by a doctor in order to prevent memory loss. after this movie, i will be playing everyday....

a new year

2008-01-01T06:19:00.000-08:00

in assessing my list for things to accomplish in 2007, i've done better than i've expected. i usually am not good at meeting goals like the ones i've set for myself.

1. i think i have devoted more time to my family and friends this year than i have in the past few years. i don't have as much time available as i have in the past, but i think i have spent some quality time with those i love. i'm excited by my new friends and having developed stronger relationships with older friends.

2. i've lost about 30 lbs within the last six months. i am very proud of this. i can actually buy clothes in the regular sizes, not the "woman's" sizes. they still are not making super stylish clothing for women who are heavier. stores like "torrid" and "lane bryant" do try, but i don't wear clothes like that. i have plans to get back on the treadmill and lose even more weight. watch out 2008.

3.i bought a new car, a nissan versa....not a mini cooper. i love it though. it's a lot of fun. love it.

three out of eight. not the worst i could do. i am 5 pages away from finishing a scrapbook...but i'm getting together with some folks on saturday. yay! maybe better late than never.

overall, there have been some serious lessons about myself and others than i've learned.

1. work on not being so paranoid about why people want to be friends with me. i'm so suspicious about people's intentions, but i need to trust my instincts overall. they have not let me down so far. i'm amazing, why wouldn't someone want to be my friend? :) (gotta love sarcasm)

2. try harder to take care of existing friendships and relationships. after reconnecting with both of my college roommates this year, i realized that one of them works at the university that sara has attended for the past five years. i am not good at consistent communication, but i'm trying to be better about not limiting it to the internet.

3. keep working on being able to say "no." (stop laughing.) i've been way better than i used to be when i was younger.

4. there is a thin line between me and those seen as "outcast" in our society. i never was able to relate to those who are seen as "crazy" or homeless. i felt so distant from those people, but in reality, i could be in there shoes in an instant. and i need not complain about where i am or what i have to do to be where i am. no one can honestly say that they cannot or would not reach that point in reality. i'm very very lucky.

5. no matter how much i learn about myself and other people. they will still surprise you. i've surprised myself.

6. don't forget to have faith that the situations that you are put into may have a lesson that you need to learn, whether it is clear at the moment or you figure it out five years from now. i'm always in a rush to know exactly why i'm in every situation, but now i'm willing to wait for the answer....at least five minutes.

7. reminding myself...life is an adventure. enjoy it. embrace good and bad. don't take it for granted. every minute counts. drama happens, rise above it. laugh or die.

a birthday to remember

2007-12-25T20:07:00.000-08:00

my birthday celebration began immediately upon my departure from work yesterday. i enjoyed a traffic free and music filled ride down to virginia beach. i was able to grab a meal and a shower before we piled into the "versa," as my car is called by my dad. we head to the most filipino church in virginia beach, holy spirit catholic church. this church is honestly 95% filipino in its congregation. it's SO filipino that we sang "Silent Night" in tagalog. seriously. unfortunately, the priest was monotone and he made me miss Fr. Kelly (from college) terribly. it was the first time in a long time that i thought about Gaudete mass and singing with the folk group.

the best part was as we were driving out of the church, i say, "i'm 35 years old...halfway to 40." my father chimes in and says, "Life begins at 40!" i respond, "so what have i been doing all this time?" my mom says, "practicing."

we went home and exchanged presents, got some super cool stuff. my mom actually bought a new christmas decoration this year and i'm trying to upload the video i took of it....it is AMAZING. my brother and i were up until 3am just catching up and exchanging movie reviews.

this morning, i awoke to the sounds of my dad making christmas brunch. i got a chance to talk to craig for awhile this morning (and he waited to call until 10am). actually this year, i received more birthday wishes on my actual birthday than i have in a long time. it was very cool. thanks mostly to the inventor of text messaging and social networking websites. it made me feel very loved.

after brunch, i went and spent time with sara and her family. they were anxiously waiting my arrival because they had set up a surprise for my birthday. they actually did a scavenger hunt around the house for my birthday gifts. yes, there was a gift in the bathroom. it was pretty funny because the clues were hilarious.

then we opened the rest of the gifts...i must say, excellent stuff. i am very grateful for everything that i have been given this year. most of all, my family, my friends, old and new, and my partner are all incredible. i don't know what would do without the people that i love.

speaking of which, sara's sister, stacey teaches elementary school and one of her students lives in the house in the video below. we went to see it tonight. UNBELIEVEABLE!!!! my first thought was, "i have to do this when we get a house." they did shows every 30 minutes from 5pm to 10:30pm. there was a crowd gathered outside and cars lined up. it was a really cool way to end my birthday. only 5 more years of practice left, i better get to work.

one day left

2007-12-23T19:21:00.000-08:00

this painting is by sara's friend, mary, and it's called hangover at hots. this is what i'd rather be doing right now versus what i HAVE to do. for those unfamiliar with my holiday traditions, tomorrow is my longest day of the year.

i have to stay up late tonight packing and wrapping presents. then, i have to work at 7am until 4pm, addressing statements like...

"i'm looking for a book, but i don't know the title or the author."

"no, i know the book is out-of-print...but i want the audiobook of this play. i looked it up on the internet."

or after a customer drinks the entire large latte, she decides that she didn't like it and wanted a refund.

[all this on top of working another fourteen hour day. luckily, nathan, my buddy, always pulls through and plays "the essential journey" album to cheer me (and most of the customers) up. so i spent the last couple of hours singing in the warehouse.]

but tomorrow, i drive home and get ready for midnight mass (we are there at 10pm). we stay up and exchange presents. then i finally can get some sleep.

i'm really looking forward to time with my family and sara's family. i need to get the heck out of dodge and get some perspective. and since i'm off the day after christmas, i get to spend the night at maribeth's. yay! there's nothing like spending time with a friend who knows you better than you know yourself. warning: there will be much more reflection.

the reflection begins

2007-12-22T04:02:00.000-08:00

as my birthday and the end of the year approaches, i begin my annual reflection on my life. this year has included a lot of changes, new job, new car and a lot of new friends. i've also been in contact with a lot of old friends this year for the first time in a long time. i just got reconnected today with one of my two college roommates. i also found my junior high locker partner on facebook.

i'm really grateful for the incredible people that i encounter and for the relationships that those encounters warrant. i love a good conversation, especially one that challenges me to think about what i truly think and whether i'm brave enough to share it. i've had some really incredible ones this year.

i have found that having younger friends, despite making me feel old at times, can give me a fresh perspective on life. i can't wait to see how they impact the world. i think they are going to be incredible.

i also enjoy the advice my older friends have to share with me. i love that i can call my friend, maribeth, as i drive to my parents and she can call me out on my crap (even though i haven't talked to her in months). she should expect a call on monday.

overall, i struggle with being a good friend at times. i think i'm the worst with the people that i've known the longest. i think i have chosen very forgiving people as my friends. i hope that people know that whether i call, email or text or not that i am constantly reminded of my friends through photos, songs, or memories. feel free to call me on my crap. or just call. craig, just don't wake me up.